Why did the chicken cross the road?
Apparently, to get to the church on time.
The other day there was an item in our paper about a wedding where one of the "bridesmaids" was—I am not making this up—a chicken. I hasten to point out that the wedding was not local. It took place in North Dakota. The vast majority of the residents of that sensible state are down-to-earth types who consider chickens to be sources of food rather than companionship. Apparently, however, there are always exceptions.
The hen in question was carried down the aisle by the fowler—oops, make that flower—girl. The same lucky child got to hold the chicken during the ceremony. Apparently she (the hen, not the flower girl) spent the time trying to eat her corsage. Which brings up the question of where, exactly, one pins a corsage on a chicken. Somewhere on the white meat, presumably. Unfortunately, our newspaper published no pictures, so we may never know.
The article didn’t mention what kind of meat was served at the reception or whether guests did the traditional chicken dance. The groom (no spring chicken himself, since the flower girl was his granddaughter) was quoted as saying that the hen was a pet and had to be included because she was "just like one of the kids."
That comparison may seem insulting. Of course, without having met the family, it’s hard to know. It does seem clear that one or the other of the two species involved in this wedding may have been the victim of a fowl slander.